Don't Ask Me To Dream
by sopaltenbass
Summary: Various characters reflect on the events at Druim Cett.  Written as a parallel fic to Thanfiction's Sluagh.


**Beta:** None  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> 1. This is a work of fan-fiction. 2. No money is made on this work. 3. JKR retains her rights. 4. Thanfiction retains his portions. 5. Sean Markey and Say Never own "In September"  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> some language, Character death (implied and explicit)  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> Sluagh by Thanficiton – all of it.  
><strong>Summary:<strong> It is hard to say goodbye when you can't understand why you had to in the first place.  
><strong>Author's Notes:<strong> This is an expanded version of the one-shot I wrote for the 3/3/11 Whose Fic for lonelyflutterby's prompt of "saying goodbye". And really, anyone who knows me, even a little bit, shouldn't be surprised that I have a tendency to write songfics. Just check out my other one-shot for a Whose Fic contest – Called to Account, or my entry for the July Contest last year – Light the Fire. The song I used for this fic is a song you've probably never heard of, by the band Say Never called "In September" from their album Broken Record Dreams. Unfortunately the song is nowhere online in full, but go check out the album on Amazon because it's REALLY good. Anyway, my friend Sean wrote the lyrics for the song. Here's what he had to say about it:

_If you can't guess, it's mostly about September 11th. I read a news article about a man who called his wife from one of the planes, but she didn't answer, so he left a message._

_What do you say to someone in a situation like that? What words are good enough to convey everything you've ever wanted to say, knowing it will be the last thing you say?_

* * *

><p><strong>Full Lyrics for "In September" (Have fun picking them out in the fic!)<strong>

I called to tell you that I miss you  
>And I want to be there with you<br>I guess there are some things I can't control  
>So, don't wait up for me<br>I'll see you when you sleep  
>It's so hard to have to leave<br>When I was so close to coming home

If you dream  
>Then dream of me<br>It may break your heart  
>You'll be alright<br>Cos, I'll be waiting for you  
>And I will see you soon…<p>

So don't forget me come tomorrow  
>At least I'm not one of those<br>Who never got the chance to say goodbye  
>It's so hard to end like this<br>With only words to say the things  
>That I could never say<br>In a thousand lifetimes…

If you dream  
>Then dream of me<br>It may break your heart  
>You'll be alright<br>Cos, I'll be waiting for you  
>And I will see you soon…<p>

The days keep passing by  
>Though it feels like it has been so long<br>The lights you've kept on  
>I have never even turned them off<br>I can't believe it  
>You won't be in my arms again<br>Don't ask me to dream  
>Cos I can't sleep without you…<p>

If you dream  
>Then dream of me<br>(Don't ask me to dream)  
>It may break your heart<br>You'll be alright  
>(I can't believe it)<br>Cos, I'll be...  
>I'll be waiting for you<br>(I'll be waiting for you…)  
>And I will see you soon…<p>

* * *

><p>"I called to tell you that I miss you and I want to be there with you. But Kingsley's got me on this mission in Belfast, to figure out what's going on with this Sluagh character, and it'll probably be awhile before I can come home. I guess there are some things I can't control." Hannah saw the longing in Neville's face, even through the floo connection.<p>

"It's all right, love. It's your job," she said, desperately wishing that she could tuck the stray lock of hair hanging into Neville's face back behind his ear.

"Hannah, I swear. Once this mission is over, I'm telling Kingsley I'm through. I've honored my side of the agreement – 'until the department's built up again'. We're getting new recruits by the week now. I'd say it's building if it isn't already built up."

Hannah smiled, a little sadly, at the man she knew she would spend the rest of her life with, and said, "Just promise me you'll be careful. Like the twins used to say on Potterwatch – keep safe, and keep faith. It will be all right in the end." She took a breath. "I love you, Neville."

"I love you, too, Hannah. I'll see you soon."

Neither had any way of knowing that the next time they would see each other would be what seemed like the last time.

Megan gasped, and Zacharias looked over at her. He could tell by her expression she had felt he galleon burn. He could almost see it glowing where it rested in the pocket of her robes. Even though it had been months since the galleon had last gone off, she was still in the habit of keeping it close.

"Oh no," Meg said, looking down at the fake coin.

"Neville wouldn't call if it wasn't an emergency…" Zach said, his voice trailing off. He wanted to go, but he also didn't want to leave Megan. It was too close to her due date. He couldn't…

"Go," Meg said.

"What? And leave you here? I couldn't do that, Meggy. The baby—"

"The baby and I will be just fine. Neville needs as many wands as he can get. Go."

"Well…all right. But you have to promise me you won't worry. You need to take care of our little one. You're sleeping for two after all. So don't wait up for me."

"I promise. Now go," she said, kissing him on the cheek and shooing him out the door.

"All right, all right," Zach said, chuckling. "I'll see you when you sleep."

"Can't wait," she replied with a mischievous gleam in her eye, and then she shut the door on him.

Neville couldn't believe his ears. It was Seamus. The Sluagh was Seamus. He wanted to ask him why, but the man who barely resembled the boy Neville had known all through school answered him before he could even open his mouth.

"It were what happened that night at the school. I drank away the pain for years before I found a new cause, and feck it, why'd it have to be so close to home?"

Neville thought he understood then. Seamus had traded one set of Troubles for another. He hadn't been able to shake the horrors of the battle and then he'd been thrust into another, but this one was of his own choosing.

"It's so hard to have ta leave when I was so close to comin' home," Seamus said, confirming Neville's suspicions. "Ya know what I say to 'em when I put me knife in their bellies?" Neville winced at the callousness in Seamus' voice. "I say, if ya dream, then dream of me. It may break yer heart, but ya'll be all right. 'Cause I'll always be waitin' fer ya and yer friends. And I'll see ya soon if I don' do it now anyway."

Neville took another swig of his mead and tried to hide the revulsion he felt inside.

_Damn you, Finnigan,_ Neville thought. Could the man have gotten them into any tighter of a jam? Here they were trapped in this effing warehouse with no magical means of escape. And Seamus was acting like it was all Neville's fault. At least Hannah was here. At least she was safe. But he couldn't stop himself thinking, _for now._

Hannah had been speaking to him, and he pulled his thoughts away from Seamus and back onto her.

"So…don't forget me, come tomorrow, if somehow one of us manages to get out of here," she said.

"Don't say that, Hannah. We're going to get out. This isn't the end."

"Still, if we don't, at least I'm not one of those who never got the chance to say goodbye. I love you, Neville Longbottom," she choked out, and suddenly, she was crying into his shoulder. "It's so hard to end like this, with only words to say the things that I could never say in a thousand lifetimes."

Neville stroked her back and hoped to Merlin this wouldn't be the last time he held her.

Hannah's eyes were blank. Their luster had gone out with her last strangled breath. Neville held her close to his chest as the tears slid soundlessly down his cheeks.

So many of them lay dead and mutilated around him, but he only had eyes for the girl he loved.

_If you dream when you're dead, dream of me. It may break your heart to be apart, but you'll be all right. 'Cause I'll be waiting for you. I promise I will never love another. We'll be together after death. I don't know how much time I have left with all this crazy shite going on, but it probably won't be long. And I will see you soon, my love._

Megan got word of the tragedy at Druim Cett the next morning. Kingsley flooed her personally. She collapsed to the floor in a sobbing heap. Neville found his mummy minutes later. She couldn't tell him. He wouldn't understand that his daddy was never coming home again. Megan didn't know if she would ever understand either.

Often, after she had put the boys to bed, she talked to Zach. _The days keep passing by. Our sons are getting so big. You'd be so proud of them, Zach. Wayne still uses your fairylights. Yes, the lights you kept on for our boys during the night. I have never even turned them off, not even during the day. I can't believe it! You won't be in my arms again. I know you wanted me to rest, to wait for you, but don't ask me to dream, 'cause I can't sleep without you._

They stood before the Morrigan, together once again, and Seamus thought it strange. He and Neville had grown strong. They could defeat the feckin' Diabhal Dubh now. With Neville's knight training and his own Celtic warrior training, they were more than ready to go back.

_If you dream, fecker, dream of me._

Seamus had uttered the epithet so many times in his fantasies and now, he'd finally be able to say it to the man who had ruined so many lives.

And then, they were back, and he broke the dark wizard, and everything went dark as his lifeblood spilled out of him.

Seamus came to in hospital. Neville was close by. He seemed unhurt, but Seamus could still feel the Diabhal Dubh's knife in his gut, even though when he ran a hand over the wound all he felt was a linen bandage.

"I must be dreamin'," he said aloud, to no one in particular.

"Don't ask me to dream," Neville replied. I've got my Hannah back and I never want to lose her again, even in sleep."

Over at the far end of the ward, Megan sat by Zach's bed.

Zach murmured something incoherent as he eased his eyes open. Megan smiled at him.

"Meg," he croaked, "I'm so sorry." He glanced at her belly, saw that it was slightly less rounded, and whispered, "I wanted to be there for you."

"It may break your heart," she answered, stroking his head, "but you're alive. And you'll be all right. You will see your sons and daughter grow up."

Zach thought his face would split with the width of his grin. "It's a girl?" he asked.

"Yes, and I know you'll want to meet little Morag as soon as possible."

"My princess, Morag," Zach murmured as the potions took effect once more and he drifted off to sleep.

"I can't believe it!" Neville yelled. "He saved all of bloody Ireland and they're still trying him for murder. It's ridiculous!"

"I know, love, I know," Hannah said, placing a placatory hand on his arm, "but you need to go. Seamus needs you now more than ever. You can testify to the years you say you spent in the Oweynagat. You can testify to his sanity on that count at least."

"But you've just said it, Hannah. I _say_ we spent those years there. Do you really believe it? Will anyone really believe it?"

"I don't know, but you have to try. And come home straight away. 'Cause I'll be…I'll be waiting for you," she trailed off with a slight smile.

"Yes dear," Neville replied.

Seamus was saved from death by Susan Macmillan. She would take him to the Loch and there he would recover and serve his time.

Neville caught him as he left his cell in Azkaban.

"You better survive this, Finnigan. I'll be waiting for you. We've got one hell of a story out of this."

"I'll do me best, I will," Seamus replied, "And I'll see ya soon, Fearless Leader."

The use of the old nickname made Neville smile. He patted his friend gently on the back, and turned into the nothingness of Apparition. He had a lot of lost time to make up for.


End file.
